Mind Your Own Business

Knowing when and how to mind your own business should be common sense.  However, knowing how to 'mind your own business' is not known to everyone.  In order to mind your own business you must first be able to set your ego aside and have respect for others.   Once again, not everyone does that.  So how does one learn how to mind their own business and not poke our noses where it does not belong? Setting my ego aside and not wanting to poke my nose where it doesn’t belong, only those interested should read on…

As a professional advisor and consultant, I am mindful of crossing the line between providing guidance to my clients and when to simply mind my own business.  However, I am amazed at how many of my clients tend to stick their nose where it does not belong, is not wanted, nor needed.  Minding your own business requires respect for others.  You need to understand that the other person is an individual with the ability to make his/her own choices.  You need to realize that you are not always right and assuming that you are, only implies you have an over inflated ego.  Recalling an old Mac Davis song, “Lord it’s Hard to be Humble”, which reminds me of the Mr. or Miss Know-it-Alls of the world! 

The best advice ever given to me was, “Live and Let Live”.   

Advice always sounds good from people who have, been there and done that.  Such as, parents, teaches, or professionals who sadly we often choose to tune out.  However, when someone who assumes to know it all offers unsolicited advice, it is so irritating.  Giving advice or helping when asked is a good thing, but simply being nosy and giving ‘well meaning advice’, when not asked is not good!  So, it is important that people understand where to draw a line when it comes to giving advice. If you aren’t asked, keep your mouth shut; and if you are asked, leave the ego out of it.   Secondly, keep it brief and respect the other person’s rights. Suggest only what you have done in similar situations NOT what they should do. Thirdly, if you have no personal experience to bring to the table or offer, then do not pretend or make stuff up to make yourself sound better.  Finally, do not be offended or upset when they reject your advice and do the exact opposite--after all, it is their right to make their own choices.  

Having said all that…

The key to knowing when and how to mind your own business is to check your ego at the front door and respect others.  When a person is humble enough to accept that other people are entitled to have their own opinions, that person is minding his own business. Keep in mind, just as you have the right to make your own choices, so does others. 

'God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me.' ~ Author unknown, variation of an excerpt from "The Serenity Prayer" by Reinhold Neibuhr